Paramedic Partners Page 11

  Yet what about his feelings for her? He was no better, blowing hot and cold all the time.

  But her face softened as she recalled what he’d said about his childhood and adolescence. She and Gavin had been cherished children. They’d never known insecurity and the lack of privacy Kane had described. He’d always had to fend for himself and it would seem that the hurt of having his life invaded and his integrity questioned had gone deep.

  Thankfully, whatever it was that Charlie had heard about him hadn’t become common knowledge at the station. She shuddered to think what he would be like if it did.

  Was she being too trusting in her own attitude? she wondered. No, she wasn’t. She loved him and was prepared to take Kane as she found him. Strong, reliable and caring.

  There had been a thousand times when he could have taken advantage of her in the close confines of the ambulance if he’d wanted to, but she knew instinctively that he was the last person to do anything like that.

  Sadly, he was the one causing the problems, with his stubborn pride and over-protectiveness.

  ‘Have you seen Kane today?’ Josh asked later as she was tucking him up for the night.

  ‘Er…yes, of course. We’re together all the time on the job, and guess what happened on my first day back? We delivered a baby girl and her parents are going to call her Selina after me. What do you think of that?’

  He smiled up at her sleepily.

  ‘Cool.’

  Yes, it was ‘cool’, she thought as she went downstairs. It had been a memorable experience that they’d almost blotted out by bickering afterwards.

  * * *

  That night Selina decided that she was going to apply to join the training course that preceded taking the exams to become a paramedic.

  She didn’t think Jill would mind as the hours that Josh was in her care would be fewer. The course took eight weeks, four of them at training school and the rest hospital-based. One of them was in Casualty. Two in theatre and one on the coronary unit.

  It would give Kane and herself time apart. Time to see if they really did love each other. She had no doubts about her feelings, but his were far from clear.

  She was aware that if she passed the exams the chances were that they wouldn’t be working together any more, that she would be allocated a vehicle of her own with her own trainee to assist. But as the health authority only gave passes to those with the very top marks, she wasn’t going to worry about that just yet.

  You’re a single parent, she reminded herself. Improving your qualifications has to be a good idea. Maybe you’ll get the chance to be a fast-response paramedic if you qualify, and then you won’t be involved with anybody.

  She smiled wryly at her flights of fancy and then grimaced at the prospect of moving out of Kane’s orbit, but something had to be done. They were getting nowhere fast.

  * * *

  When Kane found out that Selina had been to see the station officer about the paramedic course he said, ‘Thanks for discussing it with me first.’

  Still smarting from their conversation of the day before, she parried, ‘So what’s the problem? There seemed no point in mentioning it unless there was a chance of being accepted.’

  ‘And?’

  ‘He said he’d been wondering when I was going to get around to it.’

  ‘So you’re on?’

  ‘It depends if there’s a vacant place. They’re going to let me know.’

  ‘So we’re not going to be seeing much of each other if they take you on.’

  ‘No. It would seem not.’

  ‘And you’re not bothered?’

  ‘Yes, of course I am, but what good does it do us when we’re together? And in any case, why are you badgering me like this? You’re the one who’s been asking me when I was going to do something about qualifying.’

  ‘I know, but I thought it was a decision we would make together.’

  Her eyes widened in disbelief.

  ‘Togetherness doesn’t seem to be top of your list these days. That’s why I thought I’d give separation a go.’

  ‘I could shake you, Selina,’ he said through gritted teeth.

  ‘Really? Well, I suppose any kind of contact is better than none.’

  ‘What’s this I’m hearing?’ Denise called across sarcastically. ‘The Sugar Plum Fairy and Action Man having a disagreement? I don’t believe it!’

  That brought an end to the war of words and Selina was thankful that an emergency was coming through that was going to take them out into the city once more.

  * * *

  In the late evening of that same day Kane sat on the deck of The Joshua, gazing into space.

  The nights were drawing in yet it was still warm and mellow. The golds and bronzes of autumn were beginning to appear and the fields around the village were ready for harvesting.

  He had no regrets about coming to live in this place, whatever Selina might think. He had made the move to be near her…and to get away from the characterless flat. But even if she hadn’t been close by, he would have been enchanted by his new surroundings.

  At the moment he was appreciating them even more because if Selina was going to be away from the station for eight weeks, at least they would still be near each other when they were free of their work commitments.

  But what was the point of being pleased about that when he was making such a mess of things? he wondered glumly. The way he was acting was totally out of character. He wasn’t a ditherer. But, then, neither had he met anyone like Selina before.

  It wouldn’t be so bad if she hadn’t been married previously and wasn’t so vulnerable. Yet she was the one who had come to terms with that…and he was the one who was making it a problem.

  He was crazy. If he had any sense he would get in touch with the authorities where he’d come from and ask for written proof that the inquiry had found him blameless.

  But he couldn’t do it. It was as if the very fact of feeling that he had to present proof of his innocence was a sign that he didn’t have a clear conscience.

  Yet Selina had made it clear that she had no problem with old gossip. Because that was the way she was, uncomplicated and trusting. But when it came down to basics, would she really want Josh to have a new father with morals that were suspect?

  He might be the one spreading around the gloom, but he was also the one facing facts, and as Kane got up to pace restlessly along the deck he wasn’t any nearer to a solution.

  Selina had threatened to find someone else, but he knew her better than that. There was no spite in her. There was no spite in him either. All the problems in his life had been from the misdemeanours of others.

  With a last look towards the lighted windows of her cottage, which were just visible on the skyline, he went slowly down to the cabin and his empty bunk.

  * * *

  There was a vacancy on the course and it was to commence the following Monday, so Selina had no time to change her mind or to think it over.

  She’d made the decision on impulse and now must abide by it. From a career point of view it was wise thinking, and if Kane hadn’t been in the background of her life she would have been raring to go.

  As it was, she was torn between the challenge that it represented and the knowledge that they wouldn’t be partners any more.

  She knew deep down that he supported her resolve, but wasn’t getting any pleasure from the thought of it. However, as she’d told herself a thousand times, he was the one who had to make the first move. She’d done all the pleading she was going to do.

  * * *

  The work during the first four weeks at training school was hard and exhausting. It was clear that the health authority wasn’t prepared to allow its sick and injured to be treated by anyone who wasn’t fully trained and competent, and as she took part in the exercises and ploughed through the text-books provided, Selina felt that it would be a miracle if she passed at the end of it.

  Josh had been pleading to go to the boat, and as he w
asn’t old enough to go on his own she took him along the towpath one evening in the hope that they might find Kane at home.

  She’d lost track of his working hours now that she was no longer with him on the ambulance and so had no idea if he would be there.

  Luckily he was, and pleasure coursed through her at the sight of him leaning over the side of the boat, watching them, as they approached.

  As Josh scrambled onto the deck he was already asking, ‘When can we go for a sail, Kane?’

  He ruffled the boy’s fair mop with a big, capable hand, and smiling down at him, he said, ‘Why don’t we all go for a sail? The three of us? Your mum hasn’t yet got her water legs.’

  ‘I don’t think so,’ she muttered, backing away.

  She was supposed to be distancing herself from him and a sail in the autumn evening with Kane so close would hardly be that.

  ‘Yes! Yes!’ Josh cried. ‘Come on, Mum!’

  The man by his side was eyeing her quizzically as if he could read her mind. He held out a hand to her and waited, and as Josh cried again, ‘Come on, Mum,’ she stepped on board.

  ‘So how’s the course going?’ Kane asked as the engine came to life and he manoeuvred the boat smoothly out of the marina and into the middle of the canal.

  She pulled a face.

  ‘It’s hard. Very hard! I don’t think I’ll pass.’

  Kane smiled. ‘So I might get my partner back after all. I’m with a trainee at the moment and he’s useless.’

  ‘You don’t really want me to fail, do you?’ she said with hurt in her eyes.

  ‘No, of course not. I was just teasing. You’ll make a great paramedic.’

  ‘Hmm. We’ll see.’

  Selina’s gaze was on the scene before her. The banks were covered in willow trees and wild flowers and there were ducks flying over in perfect formation.

  He was following her glance.

  ‘Those fellows belong to the nature park, I’m told. They fly over every evening.’

  Her eyes were dreamy. She was glad she’d come.

  ‘Everywhere I look there’s beauty,’ she breathed.

  ‘Same here,’ he agreed, but, entranced by the scenery around her, Selina wasn’t aware that he was referring to a beauty visible only to himself.

  He was seeing violet eyes, smooth skin tinted the palest gold and the bright swathe of her hair lifting gently in the breeze from the water.

  Suddenly she became aware of the intensity of his regard and, swivelling to face him, asked, ‘What?’

  ‘This,’ he said with equal brevity. And drawing her towards him, he took her in his arms.

  In the last few moments their attention hadn’t been on Josh playing around at the back of the boat and round the cabin, but it was on him quickly enough when there was a frightened cry and a splash as he hit the water.

  ‘Josh!’ she screamed as Kane’s arms fell away to cut the engine and peel off his sweater.

  ‘Can he swim?’ he cried as he stood poised to jump.

  ‘Just a little. He’s only just started learning.’

  She was talking to space. All she could see were Kane’s heels as he followed her son into the dark green waters of the canal.

  Gasping and spluttering, Josh had surfaced, and before he was dragged down again Kane had him in a secure grip. The water wasn’t all that deep, but Selina knew there would be weeds and algae below the surface which could drag them down.

  Kane was holding onto the side of the boat with one hand and grasping Josh with the other, and when Selina saw the reeds and slime on them she knew that her surmise hadn’t been wrong.

  She reached over and grabbed Josh’s arm with an urgency born of sheer panic and then, with Kane hoisting him up from behind and herself dragging him over the edge of the boat, he was sprawled on the deck.

  Kane already had one leg over the edge and shortly afterwards he, too, was dripping all over the boards.

  ‘Mum, I’m going to be sick,’ Josh said. ‘I’ve swallowed some water and it tasted horrible!’

  She was down the stairs, into the galley and back up again with a bowl in her hands quicker than the speed of light, and as he bent over it Kane looked down at himself and said ruefully, ‘So much for the beauty around us. Do you fancy carrying on where we left off?’

  She wrinkled her nose.

  ‘I think not,’ she told him as the tears that were threatening turned to laughter. ‘You’re a smelly pair.’

  Kane masterfully regained control of the boat and steered it back towards the marina. Josh’s nausea had passed but he still looked green from every angle and Selina told them, ‘We need to get you both to hospital. There’s no telling what you could pick up from the water that you’ve swallowed. It will be full of bacteria.’

  ‘OK,’ Kane agreed, ‘but first we need to get out of these clothes and under the shower.’

  ‘Yes, and then you can have a hug for services rendered,’ she told him, her eyes tender. ‘I don’t know how we managed to cope before you came along.’

  ‘You did, though, didn’t you?’

  ‘After a fashion,’ she conceded. She took Josh by the hand. ‘We’re going home so this young man can get cleaned up. Will you pick us up when you’re ready?’

  As the boat bumped to a stop by the marina wall, he sighed.

  ‘Yes. I’ll be round in twenty minutes. What an ending to what could have been a perfect evening.’

  ‘Indeed,’ she agreed wistfully. ‘Maybe the fates are trying to tell us something.’

  * * *

  They gave Josh a thorough examination in A and E and the verdict was that he seemed all right, apart from the nausea that was still persisting.

  ‘I suggest a course of antibiotics for you both,’ the doctor in charge said, ‘and with a bit of luck you won’t have any after-effects from the canal water.’

  When they arrived back at the house Selina said, ‘Come in and have a coffee with us, Kane.’

  He shook his head.

  ‘Thanks, but, no, Selina. The boat’s in a filthy mess. I need to do some cleaning up.’

  ‘All right, then, but before you leave us there’s a promise I must keep.’

  ‘And what’s that?’

  ‘I owe you a hug.’ And before he could move she put her arms around him once more, kissed him gently on the cheek and said softly, ‘Thank you for what you did tonight.’

  It was the moment to tell her that cleaning the boat was an excuse, that he couldn’t trust himself to be alone with her without abandoning his scruples.

  But he could hear Josh calling for her and Selina was waving goodbye and closing the door. Telling himself that the boy needed her more than he did, Kane went on his solitary way.

  * * *

  Josh didn’t suffer any ill effects from his dip in the canal and Selina assumed that Kane had been equally fortunate.

  It was an assumption that lasted until a couple of days later when Jill called round to say, ‘I forgot to mention when you picked Josh up after work that the local GP was visiting your friend Kane this afternoon. I’d taken the children to the park and on our way back we saw the doctor going on board.’

  Selina had gone pale. Was he ill? He had to be if he’d called the doctor out. And if he was, who was looking after him? Nobody. He was all alone on The Joshua.

  ‘I’ll go round,’ she said immediately, to Jill’s amusement. ‘It will either be chickenpox or some sort of gastric bug after the canal episode. I’ll bet he wishes us far away. We bring him nothing but trouble.’

  ‘I don’t somehow think that Kane sees it like that, from what you’ve told me about him,’ her sister-in-law said laughingly. ‘You’re a dream girl, Selina. Any man who gets you will be a lucky guy.’

  ‘There’s only one guy I want,’ Selina said pensively, ‘and he’s not falling over himself to do anything about it.’

  * * *

  When she felt the deck of The Joshua beneath her feet Selina was suddenly nervous. There was no m
ovement on board, no noise, just silence.

  Supposing Jill was wrong, that it hadn’t been the doctor she’d seen. Kane would think she was crazy, rushing round to check up on him if her sister-in-law had been mistaken. She called his name and it echoed back at her eerily.

  As she hesitated at the top of the stairs that led to the cabin below she thought, Supposing he isn’t alone. What do I do then? Yet surely if that was the case someone would have answered her call.

  Kane was asleep on one of the two bunks that provided the sleeping arrangements on the boat, and as Selina drew nearer she saw that his face was swollen. The skin was bright red and scaly and it was the same on his arms and neck. His breathing was erratic also and every few seconds he made a wheezing noise.

  Guilt washed over her. He looked dreadful. Whatever was wrong with him, it had to be from the other night. There was a prescription for antibiotics on top of the locker beside the bed, but obviously he hadn’t felt up to going to the chemist to have it made up.

  She picked it up and as she stood with it in her hand she knew that somehow or other she had to find a chemist. But why had the G.P. prescribed more antibiotics? He wouldn’t have finished the first course yet.

  ‘Too late,’ he croaked suddenly. ‘They’ll be closed.’

  ‘I thought you were asleep,’ she said anxiously. ‘What’s wrong, Kane? You look awful.’

  ‘I feel it,’ he said groggily. ‘I called the doctor out this afternoon and he says that the tablets they gave me at the hospital are penicillin-based and it appears that I’m allergic to it.’

  ‘Didn’t you know you were allergic?’ she asked in surprise.

  ‘No,’ he croaked. ‘I’ve never had anything wrong with me before. The prescription in your hand is for a different kind of antibiotic that hasn’t got penicillin in it, but it felt like too much effort to go and get it made up.’

  ‘Why didn’t you let me know you were feeling like this? she said worriedly. ‘For one thing, I’m to blame. I should have taken more note of what Josh was up to, instead of letting you distract me. If you hadn’t had to jump in the canal after him, you wouldn’t have needed the drug.’